NaNoWriMo 2008 End

Word Count: 50,323/50,000
Time Left: 00 hours, 24 minutes, 22 seconds

I did not post at the week two end point, or week three, or week four. I considered doing so multiple times, but despite my excellent start and good intentions, I wound up just a little bit behind. And by a little bit, I mean that I wrote over 15,000 words today. That's not quite so bad when you consider that I can do about 3,000 in an hour of steady writing (I could probably type faster, but when you're making the stuff up, at least a tiny bit of time is needed to think), but is a little bit more than I would aim for in the future, and I'm lucky today was a Sunday.

Still - I WIN!

And you all called me crazy.

NaNoWriMo Week 1 End

Word Count: 6,076/50,000
Time Remaining: 22 days, 22 hours, 51 minutes

I'm off to a good start; I'm ahead of my word count at this point in time for either of the last two years, and that's even with the fact that I had something keeping me away from home every night this week. And I've settled into a pretty decent habit of writing every night, helped, I'm sure, by the fact that I had already picked up work on last year's novel. This one is turning out to be a bit more difficult to write due to the different genre. I've had to go back and seperately introduce each of the characters just to get into their heads and get to know them enough for me to actually write them, and I think I've changed who the main character is, or at least added a second one. However, it is coming along.

Now I'm off to bed, so that I can wake up in time to write a lot tomorrow - or at least get a number of other useful things done around the house.

On Routines; NaNoWriMo 2008

Having recently moved, I've noticed in a particularly strong way the fact that different places seem to lend themselves to different routines, and how much easier it is to change a routine if something bigger in your life is also changing. Without even planning it, I find myself going to bed earlier, spending less time on computer games and more on useful things, finding time to read a lot more again. Suddenly I've started actually cooking, and cleaning, and decorating. Sure, I tried to do my fair share in keeping up with cleaning before... but all of this, with one change of address, has become almost natural to me.

I've lived other places that naturally lent themselves to different activities. One that even encouraged me to get up in time for a leisurely breakfast every day - an activity I have never, at any other place or time in my life, been inclined to participate in. I've lived more places - though not all - that lent themselves to staying up very late at night every night. One place I can think of actually encouraged me to eat healthier, and I went through relatively few of my candy supplies.

A lot of the changes here could just be "growing up," but I find it interesting that these things become so much easier when there are new surroundings to match.

Another change I've found myself making, one I'm particularly pleased with, is the fact that I've started writing again. Somehow during the move I found the time I had misplaced before and renewed my work on last year's novel. I find I still like it every bit as much as I did when I misplaced my time and stopped working over the summer, and in the past couple weeks I've done some editing and written a couple thousand words.

Since I've found that extra time, I've decided to take the change again, and pause this novel for a month while I start something new... and participate in NaNoWriMo 2008. My user name is Myth. As always, I invite you to join the challenge and participate with me! Or just follow along with my weekly updates here and cheer me on.

It's Ender Again!

I've been horrible lately, allowing myself to become so busy that I neglected to check Hatrack River daily for updates. I just don't know what came over me. Had I not been so neglectful, I would have realized a lot sooner that I have not one but TWO new Ender's Game related works to look forward to.

Marvel will be putting out a comic adaptation of Ender's Game/Ender's Shadow at a yet to be determined date, and a new Ender's Game novel (!!!!!) will be available in November. I know exactly where I'll be when Ender's Exile comes out on November 1st, and it doesn't involve leaving home for any longer than it takes to purchase the book and return to curl up and read.

On Proving Your Point With The Bible....

I just had someone say to me something along the lines of "every person you love is going to leave you, it says so on page 4 in the Bible." It was a complete joke, but I had to be smart and prove this wrong by pulling out my Bible to look. I figured I'd end up with some random story about creation that would never apply.

So guess what I opened to?

The fall of man.

Perhaps one of these days, I'll learn....

A Narcissistic Post....

....of my "modeling" way back over spring break.

In Holland, Michigan.....

No, the dress didn't fit. I think it was meant for a child. The back wouldn't zip, and though it's hard to tell, I'm holding the apron on with my hands. It ends where my hands are. And those wooden shoes? Not half comfortable.


The Dutch Village had all sorts of fun statues and... statue-like things. We took a million silly pictures. I could have easily spent a whole day there.



The rest of Holland had some pretty interesting statues too.



In Marquette, Michigan.....


The most freezing water I've ever stepped into in my life. There was snow on the banks. Real, white snow. Way up in northern Michigan near Canada. Did I mention it was cold?





In and around Austin, Texas.....




Because everyone should ride a frog at some point in their life.

Some Gave All

I knew a man called him Sandy Kane
Few folks even knew his name
But a hero was he
Left a boy, came back a man
Still many just don't understand
About the reasons we are free

I can't forget the look in his eyes
Or the tears he cries
As he said these words to me

All gave some and some gave all
And some stood through for the red, white and blue
And some had to fall
And if you ever think of me
Think of all your liberties and recall
Some gave all

Now Sandy Kane is no longer here
But his words are oh so clear
As they echo through out our land
For all his friends who gave us all
Who stood the ground and took the fall
To help their fellow man

Love your country and live with pride
And don't forget those who died America can't you see

All gave some and some gave all
And some stood through for the red, white and blue
And some had to fall
And if you ever think of me
Think of all your liberties and recall
Some gave all

And if you ever think of me
Think of all your liberties and recall, yes recall
Some gave all

--- Billy Ray Cyrus - Some Gave All

Two Became One

Yesterday afternoon my kid brother became a married man, and I gained a sister. Congrats to you both!

And a couple of the best pictures I could get my hands on right now....

5th of....

I celebrated Cinco de Mayo with a day long trip to Holland. Michigan, that is. I have half a million pictures of tulips, another half million of the Dutch Village, and plenty of silly pictures of statues, all of which will have to follow much later, sometime after I do the last set of TX pictures and sort through all those from Marquette. I played a life-sized game of checkers, chatted with a few random strangers, and ended the day with the most Dutch Subway sandwich I've ever had. By which I mean it really wasn't Dutch at all, but neither is any other Subway sandwich I've ever eaten.

Aside from all that, life in MI has been very quiet. I spent a week in Marquette hanging out with my brother and soon-to-be sister, sleeping in late, discussing wedding details, watching T.V., and now and then going out exploring. Since then, I've spent my time in Ann Arbor doing extremely mundane things such as cleaning my room and editing three years' worth of pictures. More recently I've also started fussing with hair styles and make-up to prepare for my brother's wedding, mostly unsuccessfully so far. As much as I miss the noise and bustle of every day life, and I really do miss it all, it's also been nice to take things slowly and have so little to worry about. It also leaves me with very little to talk about on a day to day basis.

The main point, though, is that I'm enjoying myself. And that there are plenty of pictures to come (yes, I will limit myself). And things will soon start getting busy again, as I cram in last chances to see people, a Tigers game, and then wedding events every day this weekend, culminating with a long drive home Monday and Tuesday. I wouldn't mind another week first, but no one's asking me, so... bring it on!

Austin and Beyond

Wandering around Austin....

(Yes, I know two of them are sideways, I'll fix it later.)

....And the hill country. Specifically, Inks Lake State Park, which was not what I was looking for, but turned out fun regardless.

So it's a bit after Easter, but...

I have to show it off anyway.

April...Fools...

So I just realized that I missed removing one of my April Fool's posts...now that it's the end of the day on the 5th. Oops. My apologies. My apologies especially to anyone who did not see this blog on the 1st and was therefor utterly confused about what I was writing and thought I'd simply lost my mind. Not that I actually have an audience of more than, say, 3 people (whoever you are, you're all wonderful!), so it's not that much of a problem.

It's spring here! There are finally wildflowers all over the place. Of course, when I go back to MI in a couple weeks, I'll probably have snow, and may for once actually be disappointed about it (it's finally.. spring!), but for now I'm happy. The fields and roadsides are beautiful, and I finally am beginning to understand why other people can miss the flowers so very much when out of state....

Happy Easter!

CHRIST IS RISEN!

Dayenu

If the Lord had merely rescued us, but had not punished the Egyptians, it would have been enough.
If He had only destroyed their gods, but had not parted the Red Sea, it would have been enough.
If He had only destroyed our enemies, but had not fed us His food in the desert, it would have been enough.
If He had only led us through the desert, but had not given us his holy day of rest, it would have been enough.
If He had only given us His Words and Commandments, but not a Promised Land forever, it would have been enough.


It would have been enough - these words are probably my favorite part of the Seder meal. Those words hold the memory of all God has done for us and the promise of all that He will do. God owes us nothing; had He done no more than create us, it would have been more than we could ask, and certainly enough. This recitation begins with the reason for the meal, the night when the Isrealites were rescued from Egypt. God did not need to do more than that, yet on their journey He continued to give to them so many other blessings. Today we remember how He suffered and died for our sins; let us also remember how often He has blessed each of us since.

It would have been enough. For each of the blessings we have received in our own lives, we should be able to be grateful, to be content with what we have. Any one of them would have been enough; even the first was more than God was required to give, and each blessing, whatever it may be, is such a huge and amazing gift. Each one would have been enough; how much more wonderful, then, that God has blessed us not just once but a multitude of times.

It would have been enough. As we recognize how many times God has gone beyond "enough," these words remind us that God will not abandon us. His blessings will not stop. Each time we proclaim that it would have been enough, we are reminded that His love for us did not end, and will not end now. We can look forward to each future blessing we will recieve and trust that He will not abandon us, for just as He did not stop after the first gift, so He will not stop now, though everything we have recieved so far would have been enough.

This Night

*Why is this night different from all other nights?

I wanted last year to do a series of posts on the Seder meal. I'm starting late this year too, but hopefully I'll get a couple in. This particular start is one of the questions asked by the youngest child during a Seder meal, the meal that would have been happening on Holy Thursday, which is now replaced by the Eucharist.

On this night we wait in the Garden of Gethsemane. Before the sun sets again, God will have died. He will have been through more trials than most people can imagine, solely for our benefit. The sins of the whole world, past, present, and future, will be wiped away by the blood that is shed before the next night comes.

Before, there was a less complete salvation given to the Israelites, through the blood of a lamb spread on doorposts this night. Now there is the Lamb who dies for our guilt, our sins. This night is different because the price of our transgressions is paid. No other night will ever match the gift we have been given in this nor the love that has been shown. That is why this night is different. This night, unlike all other nights, we will be saved.


*I meant to post this much earlier in the day. When I realised I couldn't do that after work, I meant to post it immediately after Mass. I had this brilliant plan how I was going to write the post, do some grocery shopping, take groceries back to the house, get back to the chapel for the last half hour before Jesus dissapeared. Amazing how easily all that changes with just a phone call. Particularly from someone important. Particularly if that someone important wants to hang out.

The Donkey

I posted this same thing last year, but I love the poem.

When fishes flew and forests walked
And figs grew upon thorn,
Some moment when the moon was blood
Then surely I was born;

With monstrous head and sickening cry
And ears like errant wings,
The devil's walking parody
On all four-footed things.

The tattered outlaw of the earth,
Of ancient crooked will;
Starve, scourge, deride me: I am dumb,
I keep my secret still.

Fools! For I also had my hour;
One far fierce hour and sweet:
There was a shout about my ears,
And palms before my feet.

-- G. K. Chesterton

A Desperate Plea For Help

I've had my eye on a treasure chest for a long time. There's a particular store nearby where I once spotted an entire shelf full of them, and have periodically gone back just to stare at them since. (There was a suit of armor as well, but that doesn't fit into this story.)

In the past week I finally decided that it was time to purchase my treasure chest. I refrained from doing so in the past due to the cost and the lack of actual necessity. However, I've been adding to my abilities and therefor material "needs" as I grow older, while not significantly increasing the space I have available to me. By which I mean that I'm trying to live entirely out of one single room in a house.

This room started out as a bedroom. Then it was turned into a movie theatre as well. Sometime afterward, I added an office. It now sports a kitchen crammed entirely onto the top and one shelf of a desk, a music room stuffed behind the door, a gift shop hidden mostly in a dresser, an at-home school spread across the floor, and a book store neatly jammed into the closet. My bookshelves for my own non-sale books are quickly overflowing such that piles are stacked around it, I have pictures and papers and uncounted important documents practically floating through the air, and my collection of school supplies grows almost daily (I'm afraid it's breeding).

I decided that an additional means of organizing was now a need rather than a want, unless losing my mind fell under a different list of wants. And a treasure chest might as well be part of that means, a much better option than spending my money on stacks of Rubbermaid containers that I would get rid of again at the first possible chance. The chest would be large enough to stick either books or school supplies in; with one taken care of, I could later deal with the other, and adding a couple smaller containers I'd be all set.

Wouldn't you know it? I've been watching for months, just waiting for my chance. And today, the chests are ALL GONE. Every last one of them. I found a few smaller boxes, and things that vaguely resembled treasure chests but without the proper lid and (lack of) decoration, but not a single large and perfect treasure chest. I'm heartbroken. I got some very neat smaller boxes to get me started, but there's an empty hole on the wall of my room where my pride and joy should be. (The suits of armor are gone as well, though I was not expecting to buy one today.)

So if anyone knows of a location currently selling large containers resembling a pirate's treasure chest, let me know. It seems I'm in the market.

More Card Coolness

In the form of a Battle Room game! Particularly exciting as I spent many of my younger years trying to find the computer game that most closely resembled either the battle room or the command school games from Ender's Game. (I think the final result was Homeworld). Naturally a real life game would be even more exciting, but I'm afraid the best we're ever going to have in my lifetime is laser tag. Which is still pretty darn cool.

Also, the InterGalactic Medicine Show is now offering four stories, one from each of the first four issues, for free. One of these is written by Orson Scott Card, and falls into the Alvin Maker series. I've bought all seven issues so far, and after re-reading these four, I'm delighted to see one by Card available, and I think the first story in particular (Trill and the Beanstalk) is a great selection. Go read.

Plenty Out of Poverty

I recently had occassion to be reminded of the story of the lady who gave her last alm, and in doing so gave more than all the rich who gave only a small percent of what they had. Throughout the course of the conversation, something was pointed out - something that, really, should have been obvious to a theology major, had I ever bothered to think about it - that passage can mean more than money.

The point is that the woman refered to gave all that she had to God, not just that she gave Him money. It might not be our calling to put every last cent we make into a collection basket, but that doesn't mean there aren't many other ways in which we can give Him everything. Nothing we do in God's name should be done half-heartedly. However it is that we are serving God, in our vocation, at Mass, in the love we give the people around us and the services we do for them - if we don't put our best effort into those services, we are not giving all we have to God. We're only giving half, or a quarter, or whatever percentage of our efforts we bother to put to use at that moment in time. If we look at our neighbor and say, "I'll do only this much for you," we're a rich man giving only a portion of what we have in abundance. But when we can look at our neighbor, or look to whatever service it is we're performing, and say, "Here is everything I can give to you or do for you," we're like the poor woman who out of love gave all she could. However little that service might be, it's always a great service because we gave the most and best we had, and worth much more in God's eyes than the larger services we put no care or effort into.

From One Season to Another

Happy fat Tuesday! And blessings for the beginning of Lent.

I've now been a Catholic for a number of years, but this is the first in which I truly used today - Fat Tuesday, Shrove Tuesday, Mardi Gras, whatever you wish to call it - to prepare for Lent instead of just indulge. I've always been happy to celebrate the day as a big party and a reason to consume whatever sweets and drinks I wanted in the largest amounts possible.

This year, the preparation made sense. I ate donuts and sweet bread - with plans to leave all that I didn't finish on a table in the staff lounge at school. I sorted out the Christmas candy that would not keep from what will, and spent the night lounging in bed eating cookies because any I don't finish get thrown away tomorrow morning. It isn't the same as trying to use up cooking ingredients and avoid wasting money, but it's the closest experience I've had, ridding the house of the things I won't be eating during Lent to avoid just letting them spoil. I've been cleaning my room, if not fully wiping down every surface and dusting every corner. Putting away clothes that won't be worn, items that won't be used, ridding my room of clutter the same as I hope to do with my heart.

It's time, for whatever hours remain of today, to make those preparations. Clean and empty the house, put away worldly things, and get ready to meet God out in the desert. As the clock strikes midnight tonight we enter a season of repentance. It's time to abstain from lesser goods in search of higher, to turn our thoughts to who we are before God rather than what we want before men, and to do so cheerfully, knowing what awaits us at the end. For what awaits us is Easter, is life, is heaven, if only we have the courage to pass through the desert first.

For Love, Not Money

There's a large difference, I have very recently discovered, between babysitting for a few hours and actually taking care of a child.

I also, for the space of four days, filled a hole in my life that I hadn't yet realized the extent of until it was emptied again. I know it must still be so much different to be a parent, with a child or more in your care one way or another for the rest of your life, but having had even the tiniest miniscule little glimpse of what it might possibly be like, I can't imagine anyone willingly giving it up.

For a weekend I got to pretend. In one day I prepared breakfast, lunch, and dinner; I got two loads of laundry washed and three folded; two loads of dishes done; a shopping trip including four stops at various stores; kitchen wiped down and swept, as well as bathroom counters; I entertained three extra kids, for a total of five, up to and including putting away all toys at the end of the day, brushing teeth, reading a bedtime story with all but the baby clustered as close to me as they could get, a litany of children's voices reciting familiar and beautiful prayers, and finally, sleep. I still had time to do some of my own work, things I needed for school. I still had time to read a bit, to check email, to play a couple computer games, though I would willingly give up that extra time.

And at the end of the day, I knew it was growning on me - I knew it when I walked through the house one final time to make sure all lights were off and the door was locked, all toys and messes had been cleaned, all was safe and quiet. I knew it when I walked into the bathroom and noticed the floor needed to be swept, and had to talk myself out of going downstairs to get the broom. I knew it as I peeked in quietly at the five children asleep in their bedroom, and felt both peace at the closure of the day and fear at the enormity of the job I had been given where, for just one single night, five precious children were dependant on me and my ability to care for them.

(All five were up and had baths by 8:30am the next morning, too - an accomplishment I am most proud of. This random fact didn't fit in either of the previous paragraphs.)

I can't imagine what it must be like to be a parent, to live this every day, to a much greater extent than I can ever reach just by watching a handful of kids for a weekend. But I've had the barest glimpse of what a gift it must be, and am left amazed and awed by even that one glimpse.

Behind and Ahead

The year 2007 marked many firsts for me, and many defining events. I've finally reached an age - not an old age, just old enough - where I can look back at the past year and realize what steps have been made, or look back farther than the past year and truly marvel at the passing of time. Is it really 2008? Was I really only 16 when I reset my dad's computer so it wouldn't be affected by Y2K? Has it really been 7 years since we had our first Christmas in my mom's new house? I can only wonder how it must feel for people older than I to look back and wonder... because already the years seem to have passed so terribly fast. None of which says anything about the past year. I attempted a job that I disliked so much I made myself sick, and found the best job I ever imagined being able to have and most likely my life's profession. I overcame more fears than I'm willing to name, encountered so many ups and downs, spent more time with good friends than even I can remember, even successfully cooked a few things. I found I could not successfully curl or even put barrettes into my hair - but then, I've never claimed to be a wiz at this "being female" business. Perhaps it will come with time.

As part of my endeavor to grow up, I weighed my options and ended up spending Christmas day in TX instead of back with my real family in MI, the one holiday I always thought I would have a hard time dealing with being away for. Despite such worries, I had a fabulous Christmas, and I've rarely felt quite so much like I belong anywhere in this world as I belonged right where I was and with who I was with on Christmas day. I did eventually make it back to my parents' and I am back in MI now, enjoying time with my family, and with a funny thing called snow.

I need to talk about the snow for a moment. There are many things on this Earth, many natural things, that I experience no end of enjoyment whenever I have the opportunity to partake of their sights, sounds, or smells. But with everything else out there, I have always found snow to be the most calming, peaceful, and beautiful. At a time when the world seems to be in its darkest depths, filled with death in the failing plants, the already fallen leaves, the brown grass, lacking light in the short days, cold with the most chill winds, secluded and lonely as people remain hidden in their heated houses, as hopeless and despairing as the world can ever become.... Then, the snow starts to drift down from the sky, pure and white and beautiful, covering up the flaws in the world with its forgiving blanket, giving grace to the wind as the flakes dance in the air, adding light as every beam shines brightly off the unscathed surface covering the ground, bringing company as people emerge from their houses to enjoy all the delights that snow can bring from simple looking to snow angels, snowmen, and sledding. And with the snow, the world is no longer hopeless, despairing, and lonely. It's a place filled with love, with grace, with forgiveness. I never could have explained this before I became Catholic, but I've felt it all my life, and still feel it now. I've always viewed the snow as something not only beautiful but hopeful, and, when needed, forgiving. Now I simply know how to say it; I know what it means to have grace that falls down and covers my flaws, my sins, erases them to offer a new start every time.

I think what I miss most about MI is just this: the snow. It started snowing as I boarded the second leg of my journey in Chicago, and it is snowing now, promising a good and deep covering when I wake tomorrow, and I could not be more excited. I am disappointed in only being able to see a week of it; I'm homesick mainly because this has been missing from my life this past couple years, never the grace itself, but this particular representation of it which has always been so potent and so easily understood to me. When I adopt my kids* I will make a trip north every winter to ensure that, whether or not they get this same understanding of the snow that I have, they will at least grow up with the opportunity to enjoy the games snow always suggests to the young (and the young at heart). It need not be a long nor far trip, but, always, if I have any possible way of doing so, at least far enough north to see snow and have that chance to admire it and play in it.

Getting off the topic of snow, and on to the part where the new year known as 2008 is beginning, it's time to look ahead to what this new year might bring. I don't put much weight behind traditional resolutions, but I've learned the value of measurable and accomplish-able goals, and also of mentioning those goals to others beside oneself, and rather than give a list of resolutions such as far too many others might (or, for all I know, might not) do - I wouldn't dare be normal - I'm going to publicize here a list of my calculable goals. This has the added benefit of allowing others to laugh at me, egg me on, offer assistance, or assure me of just how insane I am, according to your liking.

1. Sew a skirt for myself. (This requires learning some basics about how to sew.)
2. Finish writing my 2007 NaNoWriMo novel - or reach 300,000 words, whichever comes first. (Easily doable as long as I keep setting aside time to write.)
3. Save another $500 to put toward travel in Europe. (I have a separate bank account specifically for this purpose; I just need the money put into it.)
4. Bake a pie. (Easily done, but previously attempted only once, with two pie crusts that both failed for extremely silly reasons.)
5. Learn to sight read notes on the bass clef when playing piano. (As in, not having to figure them out one by one before playing anything.)
6. Win NaNoWriMo 2008. (More than anything else, this one requires organization.)
7. Take at least one class - either teaching certification, or something related, or something fun. (I'm hoping to begin certification classes; but failing that, I will get myself into something else useful or enjoyable.)
8. Gain the needed confidence to carry a melody by myself, without an instrument or another person doing the melody, while singing with a group. (I thought this would be the hardest by far; then I went to choir yesterday, and found myself attempting to sight read the alto harmony for almost every song. More unusual, I found myself attempting to do this without anyone to listen to, except when I asked to hear the piano after sightreading certain pieces to pick up the bits I missed. And.. 'lo and behold.. I actually got a lot of it. And let people hear me singing it. I now have confidence in my ability to complete this by far simpler goal.)
9. List 200 books for sale. (A matter of making the time. I've got maybe 20 so far, that I found time to price and list before Christmas.)
10. Learn to play one song on guitar. (I've had my guitar for a couple years now. I had one person attempt to teach me to play. This attempt failed due to my inability to comprehend half of what he was talking about, and my further inability to recognize a song when playing anything but the melody. Due to my growing range of musical experience, and my continued desire to be capable of playing, I think it's time to try again. A year should be sufficient to learn one song, right?)

And this concludes my post this evening; it's long past my bedtime, even for this particular night, for here in MI the party ended hours ago. Goodnight my friends; and happy new year!

* This does not suggest any immediate plans on my part, only a future hope that when I am sufficiently settled I will be able to provide a home for a family of children, or whatever home can be offered by a single mother to a group of hard to place children. I will not, for example, have any need to begin this tradition next winter.