The house of my soul is narrow;
enlarge it that you may enter in.
It is ruinous, O repair it!
It displeases Your sight.
I confess it, I know.
But who shall cleanse it,
to whom shall I cry but to you?
Cleanse me from my secret faults, O Lord,
and spare Your servant from strange sins.
Dies Cinerum; Ash Wednesday. Never would I have expected to welcome the beginning of Lent in 70-80 degree weather, or start it off by taking a five-year-old to get ashes, or even, once upon a time, to have found a home with other Catholics among whom the day to day observances of the different seasons are not out of place and uncommon. Today's ashes are not a specific reminder of the unexpected, near and far future, but they are a reminder of death. It's something most people don't expect to occur in the nearer future, or expect to have to deal with expecting. Christians hear often of Christ's death, life after death, and the joys of heaven, yet how many of us when asked would say "I am ready?" Perhaps more than I'm guessing, perhaps not.
That's what the priest's homily was all about today. It was my sixth time listening to an Ash Wednesday homily, but the first time I've heard a priest talk so specifically about death instead of the meaning of the ashes, the importance of conversion, or other favorite topics. Within the topic of death, and once he finished reminding us that there are people who expected to be here today and aren't, and some of us expect to be here next year and won't be (and we never believe that'll be us, do we?), he went on to mention the importance of our relationship with God. That we shouldn't only talk to him while doing other things, though continual prayer like that is good; that we shouldn't only talk to him when we want something. Like in any relationship, we have to spend time with God, with just God, and it shouldn't be a time of "I want this, I want that." Other relationships we have go far beyond that, and our relationship with God is the most important relationship we have. It's that one that will matter most when it turns out that our time is up. It's good to enjoy life, and to look forward to each day of living; but to do so while waiting for, looking forward to, an eternity of Life. If we found out we were to die the next day, or next week, or next year, we should be ready.. not rushing through a laundry list of things to do to prepare as we suddenly realize that we've been neglecting our Father, and have only limited days to develop a spiritual life and get to know Him. This new season offers us another opportunity to develop that relationship now.
(On a not-so-completely-different note, DarwinCatholic is doing a series of meditations on Dante's Divine Comedy during Lent; the first is up today. Go check it out.)
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